For a number of reasons I grew up not particularly getting along with my dad. Some might say we were chalk and cheese, but so many said we were just like each other. It was said so often that I was “Just like your dad”, that I believed this to be true.

However, the one fly in that ointment was that most of the time I didn’t like my dad very much. He was an alcoholic who had been adopted as a baby, and because he didn’t have a great childhood, he didn’t have a template for how to be a good dad…so wasn’t.

When you’re told regularly that you are ‘just like’ someone who you see as not being such a great person, you start to believe that you aren’t that great either.

As a result, from my teenage years and beyond, I found solace in food. Looking back now, I see that when I carried extra weight (and I ended up carrying a lot!!) this would mean that nobody would fancy me, so nobody would want to get close to me. I used this as a barrier from anyone finding out that I wasn’t all that nice. This masked my insecurities and meant that I had few close friends.

Jump forward to my 40s and my health wasn’t great primarily due to the weight I was carrying…simply walking to the local shop, something that now takes just 10 minutes, would leave me breathless, in pain in my knees, hips and back, and needing to rest to recuperate when I got home. I was also struggling with depression, no doubt compounded by loneliness having kept most people at bay.

​I made the decision that I had to at least lose weight. Therein lies my first saviour (well, he wouldn’t see it that way, but it started me on the path to who I am now). I signed up at a small boutique fitness studio run by a couple of PTs. I started resistance training, body weight at first, adding weights as I improved, and learning (or relearning) about nutrition and remembering what I should be eating to help shift this burdensome weight.

Move forward a few more years, and still overweight, but over 5 stone down on my heaviest, and I recognised that although the weight had come down, I was still keeping myself withdrawn. The weight coming off had made me healthier in my body, but there was still something in my mind that was holding me back from making the most of myself.

Lightbulb moment… I saw a post from a coach about to start a programme for women. I emailed the coach and said that I knew I didn’t want to be in the same position I was in now in 5 years’ time, but had no idea what I wanted to be doing or how to go about it. Would this programme help? “Hell yes!!” was the response. Though part of me thought, ‘well, he is going to say that as he’s selling his programme’, I went for it…and he couldn’t have been more right. I took the plunge and decided to invest in myself for once. (It’s most definitely an investment and not a cost - sounds cheesy and a sales pitch, but if you’re willing to put the work in, it’s definitely true.)​

What came from that programme is that I knew I wanted to help people. I wanted to help people who were like me, well the old me, who have been stuck in that rut not knowing where to turn, or how to dig a way out. Having done this for myself, with a few pointers along the way (each of my ‘saviours’ would say that it isn’t down to them, and that without putting the work in myself it wouldn’t have happened…which is true, but I still have them to be thankful for their guidance and support) I am now in a position to help you do this for yourself too.​

So here I find myself, on a fabulous journey, destination unknown, and to be honest, not altogether relevant. I’m still losing weight, a little way to go yet, but enjoying the process and not feeling deprived. Happy for it to take as long as it takes. But most of all, I am happy, and positive about my future.​

The truth in this life is that we don’t need to do it all alone, no matter how many times we may feel that way. I found that support in my coaches (both in fitness and in life in general), now I want to do that for you.​

If you are feeling stuck in a rut, not knowing how to get out, or which direction to turn, drop me a message and we can set up a quick discovery call and see if I can help you.

Come on a journey with me.

Find your reason to change, not the excuse to stay the same.